Employer Columnist

Psssst… listen and listen carefully

 

“This is your mind talking, that little voice you hear every once in a while, you may know me for the angel or devil on your shoulder. I’m your inner voice whom you hear every time you want to pick up that ice cream or cigarette; I’m the voice you hear when you ask yourself if you should go up on stage to speak. I’m the voice that puts thoughts of gluttony, anger or jealousy. I’m the voice that makes you sit on the couch instead of putting on your running shoes, I’m the voice that says that it is ok to sit and watch three hours of television everyday while neglecting your family and life success.

“Yes, it’s me, that soft gentle soothing voice that influences you ever so easily. You are a slave to my whim. You are a slave to my every desire, every mood I have, and do you follow?”

Does that sound familiar? That inner voice that influences you to do the things you know you ought not to do? I am very familiar with this voice. I have fallen prey to the relentless barrages of messages that this inner voice has whispered into my ear. But here’s the thing, in the past I did not know how to control it. I was not aware that there were ways and methods on controlling this voice. Once we can control this voice we are free.

We free ourselves of temptation, we free ourselves from the bondage of desire and sloth, we free ourselves from unresourceful, self defeating thoughts that limit our potential and limit our success. Once we free ourselves from our inner voice the world really has limitless possibilities. We are better able to face the world and its challenges. We will gain better career success, better relationships, more money and we shall be happy. Because happiness is only one thought away.

Am I sure? Let me demonstrate. Take your time, stop reading after this sentence and think of your happiest moment, think of where you were then, think of what you were doing, who was around you, feel the surroundings, smell the place, listen to it’s sounds, how you smiled, how you laughed. Think it, feel it deeply. Now when you are done visualizing, how do you feel? Better? Happier?

Yes, happiness is just one thought away. I had to learn these skills along the way in my journey of self discovery and personal development. I used to be a slave to my thoughts and feelings and now I have learned to question my thoughts, I have learned to doubt my long held beliefs and I am free because of this. So today I shall show you one method to question your inner voice.

This is the method used by Byron Katie and outlined in her book Loving What Is. When you have an unresourceful thought that comes in and it makes you upset, uncomfortable or it disempowers you from taking action ask these four questions to reexamine the thought: -

  • Is it true?
  • Is it absolutely true?
  • How do you feel when you think that thought?
  • Who would you be without that thought?

You will quickly realize that it is not what happens to you that makes you feel upset or uncomfortable, it is the thought and meaning you attach to the event. These four questions will take you out of your problem and will put you in third party observation. I’ll give you one example. You think your partner is cheating on you. Here’s what the answer might sound like.

  1. Is it true? Yes, he stops me from checking his phone and seems to be acting strange recently
  2. Is it absolutely true? Well, I can’t be 100% certain
  3. How do you feel when you think that thought? I feel terrible, I distrust him and I’m wary of him and I watch all his actions.
  4. Who would you be without that thought? I would be happy, it would allow me to love him as he is and I would be at peace and we will have harmony.

Once you let go of your thoughts, it is very powerful and will move us towards resourceful, problem solving states. Try it. Of course, when you hear a kind and supportive thought you don’t have to control it, just let it talk more.

Your inner voice will dissent, your inner voice will reject your new thinking style, your inner voice will do everything to stop you because “Psssst! You’re not supposed to know”.

But the days of your inner voice weaving its control over you is over. From now on you shall study the mind and how to control it. Then, you will persevere and become the master of your inner voice and your destiny.

Here are some mind bending titles: -

  • Loving What Is – Byron Katie
  • Awaken The Giant Within – Anthony Robbins
  • Zero Limits – Joe Vitale

Written by
Edmond Yap
Education Republic
www.edurepublic.com

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Edmond is a qualified civil engineer who has been working in the engineering field for 5 years.  Switching career in motivational speaking and training, he was the performance consultant at the Malaysian chapter of Dale Carnegie Training. His love of motivating and inspiring people prompted him to starting up Education Republic with a few others. 

He can be reached at edmond@edurepublic.com